Tomorrow is my 28th month anniversary from when China accepted my family as a potential caretaker for one of their citizens. It was June of '08 before they had time to review my file and truly accept us. I know this is not to be taken lightly.
As the wait gets longer, it gives me time to ponder.... I have two children and there are so many out there waiting who have none. Every month that goes by is two months more of waiting. In March the wait was 36 months, now it's the end of May and we are at 38 months.
One thing I hold to is that if I was not waiting....I'd still be wanting, so I might as well do both.
Where is JLee??
JaLia Willa Worsena Howell
Friday, May 29, 2009
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
A sad note
Today I saw this interesting article. It was in usatoday and got lots of negitive feedback.
While I too, am waiting (now at 25 1/2 months) I applaud China for getting it's head out of it's ass and starting to look at it's Human Rights policies. Of course, I think China is slightly biased towards us outsider's average weight ranges and if you have seen the air pollution in China, you'd know that second-hand tobacco smoke would be a step up.
Here is parts of the article, edited for length. ~
GUANGZHOU, China — The White Swan is empty. The five-star hotel here that historically has housed American couples looking to adopt Chinese babies now only sees a slow trickle of would-be foster parents after the Chinese adopted a raft of stricter rules a few years back.
The cribs and baby strollers the hotel lends out sit idle. The tables in its 1980s-era lounge overlooking the Pearl River are gloomily vacant.
None of this bodes well for American couples looking to adopt here, but it highlights the progress China has made as social mores here shift for the better.
Since 1989, China has sent more orphans — over 70,000 — to the United States than any other country. American couples flock here because its system is far smoother and more transparent than most. And China's one-child policy has resulted in millions of baby girls left abandoned, not to mention millions more aborted. The likelihood that your adopted girl is an actual orphan and does not suffer from, say, prenatal alcohol syndrome, is greater in China than most places. And let's face it, Chinese babies are cute — something the authorities here play up. But adoptions are down dramatically, as a result of the restrictions imposed in 2007: just fewer than 4,000 Chinese babies were adopted by American couples last year, about half the total in 2005.
Much is fair game to disqualify prospective parents: Age (nobody under 30), marital history and sexual orientation all matter now. Even issues of health — being overweight or taking antidepressants — can nix a couple's application. That has Americans frustrated.
But China's new adoption rules, while onerous, simply reflect its evolution into a more modern society. After all, Beijing is well within its right to decide its own rules and weed out unhealthy parents. Why shouldn't it try to prevent its orphans from inhaling secondhand smoke? China also appears to be relaxing its laws on the number of children Chinese families can have. Sure, it's partly a PR gambit. Ahead of last year's Olympics, the government did not want be perceived abroad as deadbeat caretakers. But it's also a concerted effort to reverse its gender imbalance. "China's feeling the stress of having lost so many girls," says Adam Pertman, executive director of the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute.
As income levels in China rise, more couples are just breaking the one-child policy and paying the fine (about $5,000). Adoptions by Chinese couples are up. And social attitudes are evolving, too, resulting in fewer parents discarding their daughters. Half the Sky Foundation, a U.S.-based nonprofit, reports that fewer healthy babies are entering its orphanages in China.
Of course, data are difficult to verify, but these anecdotal trends are positive. What's more, the notion of American foster parents rescuing abandoned orphans from Dickensian state-run institutions, while romantic, may be somewhat overblown. "Unfortunately, this story is largely fiction," E.J. Graff of Brandeis University wrote recently in Foreign Policy.
Most orphans are older than 5, sick or disfigured — not the kind most Westerners want. Think of the baby in the newspaper staring up at readers with a cleft lip.
Even so, it seems unfair: At a time when a California woman makes headlines for giving birth to octuplets, there are thousands of infertile American couples for whom foreign adoption remains their best — and least costly — option for parenthood. Their prospects are only exacerbated by China's tougher regulations.
But it signals good news for Chinese society, which is becoming more welcoming toward its newborn daughters and domestic adoption. Were the White Swan to close, nobody in China would probably mind.
Lionel Beehner is a writer based in New York City.
Posted at 12:15 AM/ET, March 18, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
What happened to spring????
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Jan 30 th Happy (????) Anniversary
Wellll.... I've been officially waiting now for 24 months. I am plowing forward with positive visualizations. All things will happen this year. I marked the occasion, my LAST waiting anniversary with a start to a Red Thread cross stitch. I started with the traditional red and black colors and am planning on doing another in purple/pink/yellow for JLee's room.
Jan 26th -Year of the Ox
Thursday, January 22, 2009
local "Families with Chinese Children" party
I found this invitation design on Smilebox. It was sooooo beautiful, I had to use it. I know Cindy thought I was being crazy but I got lots of positive feedback from the club.
Make a Smilebox invite |
Jan 26th - I didn't take my camera to the party. Too busy running around and I knew the other parents would all have theirs ;0) Someone did post a bunch on photos online but the website has figured out how to block me unless I buy them !! :0(
Anyway, My niece Lily ended up going with us and was a great playmate for the tots. The boys had a fabulous time doing who knows what but they were happy, exspecially during the "Lion dance".
Thursday, January 8, 2009
2009 Countdown
How many referrals am I away from my daughter???? Will this be my year????
Referrals came out on New Years Eve, that's twice in the same month !!! 3 weeks apart !! .....Please be a sign of a speed-up in turn around time !!
A few of them were for 6 month old babies...the youngest you can get. I worry alittle about the age gap with the boys if I received a 18 month old....Then I remember how cute, cuddly and fun that age is.
China has a policy of waiting 6 month after a babies is "found" to give time for family members to claim them, then they are considered adoptable. In the US, it is 12 months minimum in foster care before becoming adoptable. Many times that stretches and stretches for a variety of reasons !!!!
2 families had to decline their referrals (that always scares the hell out of me). 2 babies were from JiangXi province and were both named Yi Xiao with different middle names.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Happy 2009
I spent some time Friday playing around with my blog and all the design elements fell in place. !!!!!!!yea I'm not the ugly duckling any more. Maybe it means my time has come ?
I changed my tag line on my email for 2009. It reads my favorite adoption quote....
"To the World, you may be one person..... but to one Person you may be the world"
I found a website called Smilebox while reading another adoption Blog. It has lots of designs to work with and is so easy even I can use it. I spent some time over the holidays editing my photos into albums and then email or posting them.
Here is a fall one I did of the boys. I love shooting them from the back....I wonder how old they'll be before they stop holding hands :0)
Make a Smilebox slideshow |
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