Fall '12

working the Lion's club pumpkin patch

Summer

Happy 4th BD

Coco Channel

Spring '12

Happy Chinese New Year

Thanksgiving

JaLia loves to swim

Relaxing

JaLia with her pop pop

JR, JL & JX getting the big one

The summer has been pretty uneventful. After a mad dash to find a school in the boys daycare area, the principle finagled the bus route and they got to stay at their old school. My dad was in town for the fall so I offered to drive him back to Florida with the three kids in tow. The trip was great and I can't wait to make it a twice-a-year event.

I don't know if it was a thanksgiving miracle or the fact that I spent a week straight with JaLia but the potty training "clicked" and her speech blossomed to several words together to make a real sentence.

July update

JaLia shared her 3rd birthday with little friends at our cabin. I had bought foil wrapped chocolates that looked like lady bugs and thought they would be cute on cupcakes covered in green icing. Then Jessica had a Fairy party for her darling and make some adorable red toadstool decorations. I stole the idea and took off with a woodland theme. I prepped, cooked and cleaned but didn't take a single picture. Still waiting for my friend with a savvy camera to send some photos. Soon after that Jalia's language began to bloom. At first I thought I was making it up cause she could sing the whole tune to a nursery rhyme and I understood which one it was. Then I realized she was speaking to me, saying words and I understood. Wow... what a change from me asking her questions and her parroting back at me. Everyday there are new words that I "tune" in to. No more playing whose-on-first !!! Soon she'll go in for her 3 yr physical. She has filled out alot in the tummy but doesn't seem to weigh much more unless I'm getting my grams to pounds mixed up. 6 lbs in the last 6 months I think. She has grown about 3 inches and is the same height as the boys when they were the same age !!! She is always singing, talking and has never met a stranger. She has slowed down on the eating. She puts herself to bed, sleeps thru the night and wakes up happy and ready to go. She actually gets mad on the weekends when we don't take her to daycare. We just had our 6 month post placement interview and I need to get her I600 turned in so we can finish up all the legal stuff.

baby showers

After my planned baby shower, i got a suprise one and sooo many gifts. Luckily they were all dresses cause i hadn't bought her a one.

Lawyers, Tigers and Bears.. oh my

I have had much consternation over this re-adoption vs registering adoptions debate. I am a "1 traveling parent" family so I always believed that my husband/we would need to readopt our daughter when we got her home. When I returned home from China I got a letter from FTIA saying that Keith could register adoptions for a small fee and there was a note at the bottom of the letter that started IR-4 families could "either" register their adoption or take the more costly and time consuming route of readopting. I called the agency and was told that was a misprint and that I had to go thru the re-adoption process. I knew of several families on the FTIA thread who had filed themselves and had even gotten copies of forms off the Internet. I called the Lawrence county xx office and a very rude person told me she didn't know how to file it and she didn't have the forms, I told her I had forms but she insisted that I needed to go thru a lawyer. I should of called Keith back right then and there but I assumed that more costly and time consuming also meant face time with somebody so I opted to use a local lawyer in my county. At my appointment I took everything I had and after 10 minutes the lawyer decided that since I had the power of attorney, everything was filled out as if my husband had been right there in the room with me. THERE WAS NOTHING SPECIAL TO DO. All I had to do was file a petition to register the adoption in the state of Indiana. I had to include the following exhibits...Chinese and translated birth certificate, translated abandonment certificate, original and translated adoptive registration certificate, a copy of her permanent resident card and a copy of the original and translated Chinese decree of adoption. Then I had to fill out an additional medical form for the health department. I filed a petition to waiver a home study (I included a copy of my existing one)I filed a petition to waiver the punitive father registry fee AND then I got a bill for.... ouch $$1250.00 It took one month to get the court decree. The lawyer sent that on to the Health dept. for a birth certificate. The Health dept. informed me that foreign births had to wait 90 days from the date of the court decree. Once I get the birth certificate then I can go to the Social Security office and get a SS number. Some time after that I can apply for her certificate of citizenship, finish up the I-600 forms and I should be done.

Insurance Coverage

For any of you out there considering the special need, VSD - Ventricular Septal Defect, there is very little info out there on costs for treatment. Here are some numbers that applied to my situation. I searched high and low for some general idea so i could determine if i should switch to high-option insurance or even change companies. I also had employer assist but once you bank the funds, you lose what you don't use. yikes! After weeks of begging, the hospital's pre admission dept. reluctantly gave me a figure of $250,000 and by that time it was all up to the divine. My daughter had the surgery in February for a large hole and only spent 5 days in the hospital. 1 day more than she needed in ICU cause they didn't have any vacant beds (yah, right but the insurance covered 100% of her stay ) So I was pleasantly surprised when the bills started rolling in and it came up to about $125,000. About $10,000 wasn't "covered". I'm not sure why or how but the hospital is dealing with my insurance company on that still. It seems that half the people involved were not in my PPO so I have alot of 35% co-pays instead of 15%, something you just can't control. I got a new bill the other day but I think I have the end in sight. So far I'm happy to say my co-pay seems to total approx. $5000.

April Update - Jeremiah and JaLia visit Tessa at the Park

Last month my friends at work held an Welcome Home party for JaLia. The boys were on spring break so they got to come and my mom brought them all so I didn't have to miss work !! JaLia was on her best behavior and enchanted the group. She is so friendly and outgoing, doesn't know a stranger. Luckily everyone left before she decide it was time to start acting up, I pasted it off as nap time -haha. I called to see when i needed to bring her in for a cardiologist appt and they said "can you come tomorrow" $$$$ so I made the trek up to Riley and took her in for an EKG. Dr S said everything looked great, took her off the meds, he said it really takes 6 months before the skin would grow over the patch so just come back in.... a year. I doubt I follow up on that. From our experience VSD's are a piece of cake. Short hospital visit, no complicated follow up. I really haven't noticed any change since the surgery.This girl has the same amount of energy as she had before, she never had bluing, only issue was the drain on her calories. She is putting on the tummy but hasn't grown otherwise.............................................. JaLia doesn't say much on her own that i would categorize as trying to communicate, she understands it all and can repeat but I would love for her to start to initiate what she wants. She did tell one of the boys the other day to "sit down" and she says Jaxon-no-no constantly regardless of which boy she is talking to so we have made that the family joke....................................................... She has learned the word "quiet" at daycare, which is much nicer than mommy's constant "shut-up" to the boys. It seems like she is talking more but really I can't understand any of it and don't know if it's chinese words or babble......................... We finally had a chance to get with the Families with Chinese Children (FwCC)group for a playdate in the park. JaLia was so busy on the equipment that she didn't get to interact with many of the kids nor did I get a chance to chat with many of the parents but it was a beautiful day and I'm sure we will get many more chances now that it is spring.

Over simplified ??

I was worried after my last post that I had mislead some of you. I thought JaLia was having issues with eating too much. She was throwing fits as soon as she got home each evening. I was having issues with giving her snacks before dinner. I really didn't want to reward her behavior with food and set myself up for bigger issues later. I asked my pediatrician and he was taking her side! I resigned myself to healthy "appetizers" and told myself that they were just part of her dinner......... It turns out that what she really didn't like was being "gated" in the toy room while I was too busy cooking to watch her. As soon as she hears that click, she cries. If the boys are there playing near her she is fine but if they leave her just for a second to go to the bathroom or what ever...look out............ Now that she is in daycare and getting snacks every 2 hours, she has been eating less at dinner. Its either that she is full or understanding her meals will be frequent or she is getting over a growth spurt either way I'm feeling better about that. They also sing alot of songs at daycare. The girl loves music anyway but she has taken to singing loudly to herself, there are some hand motions too but I just can't figure them out............... Her follow up appointment with the surgeon at Riley got canceled and I'm not sure I see the need to go back. I will schedule a follow up with the cardiologist just to see if I can get her off this medicine............... The bills are starting to roll in. They seem to be alot less that what I thought so that is a nice surprise! Still it's extra on top of the adoption expenses that i hadn't planned on.............. She is still scared of the big wide outdoors but getting a little more comfortable walking around by herself.

milestones

JaLia is way beyond being "from China" in my mind. That girl is sharp and understands most of what you say to her. She is now a normal, "i'm 2 1/2 and I'll do it my way, when I want to" kid. She does say lots of things like, bye bye and tickel tickle but mostly repeats when she is prompted. So far her only interest in communicating to us is to tell and sign to us that she wants to "eat" or have "more" and she does that all day long. Last night she actually said night night and made the go-to-sleep sign. I wasn't sure she meant it so I picked her up and rocked her and she didn't try to get down. When I carried her off, she was fine with putting on her jammies and went right to sleep. yea.......... Now if I can break her of that horrible habit of whining over every little thing. It a little hard to communicate to her to slow down, think it over, work it out hahaha

I'm caught up

I'm back at work !!!!!!!!!!! Wouldn't you know it, she slept in this morning but we got out of the house on time. Gosh I was so bored at home. Never a long enough stretch in the schedule to really do anything. JaLia has started daycare and she seems very happy. I just hope everything stays calm for awhile till I can get back in the groove............................. Feb 28th Had our pediatrician check up and she is looking good. Got the ok to start daycare......................... Feb 26th I am giving JaLia her diaretic earlier in the late afternoon and TRYING to give her a after dinner bottle earlier in the evening and it is helping with the middle of the night wakings!!!!.......................... Feb 23rd JaLia is not taking ANY pain meds and she is just fine. She is running around and climbing on stuff like nothing happened. She is on a diaretic which causes her to be wet more often and I think that is the cause of her trouble sleeping thru the night................. Feb 21st JaLia got the green light to come home....................................

JaLia didn't get much of a nap Sunday. Just as I got her to sleep the surgeon came and took out the pacemaker wires. The nurses had tried earlier without much success and Jesse was fit to be tied ! The boys had a good visit with her and then Jesse took them back home. I gave her a big dinner and a sponge bath and fresh sheets. She sucked down a bottle and I hope she slept well all night. This morning I started to load up my car and I put the car seat back in, I sure hope that doesn't jinks anything. Then as I was walking across campus I saw 1 GINKO leaf on the sidewalk. I didn't see a single ginko tree or any other ginko leaves. I'm sure that was kismet....... If everything looks good with bodily functions, they will release us today!!

Holding her own

They took the chest tube and the groin IV out of JaLia this morning but couldn't get the sutures out for the pace maker so we are waiting for the surgeon to come and do it. Of course she just fell asleep so he'll likely come now ;0) We just need to wait for the return of "normal bodily functions" and see if she has a clear chest x-ray tomorrow and we hope we can go home. She is on little if any other meds and is eating just fine. They are not happy that her blood pressure is high but then she freaks out crying every time they try to take it so go figure!!!

We're moving on up

JaLia was doing so well Friday night that they could of moved her out of ICU but they didn't have an empty bed at the Heart center. Today she continued to eat, play and wean off from her pain meds. They removed her oxygen tube and the heavy arm cuff that protected her IV and she didn't bother anything. She has some jumper wires hooked up to her heart in case they would need to hook up a pacemaker and they have a chest tube sewed in to provide drainage. They are moving her up to the heart center tonight and hopefully they will continue to disconnect her from all the foreign matter. She has been happy and played all day, just two days out of surgery!!! I spent the day with the boys doing household chores and we made brownies, cookies and cupcakes to take up with us tomorrow.

Chica is chipper

JaLia is doing great. They have decreased her pain meds and she is awake enough to be pissed off. They have removed most of her IV's and she is drinking. We will try to give her some food soon and they may let her out of ICU tonight!! Ok so the banana yogurt wasn't a great choice but the girl likes her waffles. Jesse is here visiting and has volunteered to try out the new Temperpedic mattress at the RMH and let me go home and get some real sleep ~haha After many sleepless nights, too much caffeine and sugar and too little solid food, I went home for a needed break and a home cooked meal of Wal-mart rotisserie chicken ;0) I wasn't feeling well and it was great to be home again.

She's OUT

After the 12:49 summons to come down and speak to the Dr. I waited another 40minutes and then smiling nurse came by to say it everything was fine, JaLia was in ICU and I should wait at least 30-40 minutes more to see the Dr. and then they would be ready for me to see her. I told her if he was busy I could just go see my daughter but she wanted me to wait. Luckily he popped in a few minutes later, "everything went fine" he said. I went down to grab more coffee and lunch and 25 minutes later went to the Ped ICU to find her. The nurses wouldn't let me in so the janitor did ~haha They weren't ready for me and tried to kick me out but Dr Schamberger was with her. He said her pressure was back to normal levels and he was very happy. She is off the ventilator and woke up fine from the anastesia. I'm going to see her now.

Still waiting.....

So the surgery waiting area is a small area where all the families sit around and a nurse walks thru every hour, on the hour to give updates. It creates a tension...waiting for that time to get closer. Waiting for the smiling nurse to come through just so she can say "everything is going fine" and then walk away. Watching the smiling doctors come through with their coffee cups in hand. How many cups of coffee should a doctor drink in a day?? Watching them tell the other families how everything went great, or worse watching other families cry and being happy that it isn't you....and then feeling bad about that. I couldn't stand to sit THERE so I went down to the Ronald McD lounge. Nice atmosphere but then I'm partial to mission......very calming. They have COFFEE, food and very comfy chairs. 12:00 update Everything is fine. The doctor is ready for me now.....gotta go.

We're here

Yesterday was a long day.....we were suppose to be at Riley by 11am. After checking in and giving more blood they sent us off to lunch. Then we waited around and they decided she needed more chest x-rays. Then we waited some more. About 3:30 the OR nurse came in, then around 4:00 an anesthesiologist, and then the Surgeon showed up before 5:00 for a quick How-dee-do. The Ronald McDonald House, (RMH) told me they were full and there was no way I would get a room that night. I called around and found a place and as I was driving into the hotel parking lot I heard my phone buzz. I had left it on vibrate while JaLia was napping!!!!!!!! RMH called and said they had a room !?!?!!! So I called the hotel and asked if I could cancel, it was 6:10 but she said no problem. I whipped around and drove back to the RMH. Really nice, large facility, different group bring in dinner everynight but they have 2 kitchens with plenty of storage space for your own food if you want to cook for your family. It's very inexpensive and quiet but you share a bathroom with 1 other room and no TV or food in your room !! good-bye chocolate - NOT JaLia got a late dinner, a antibacterial bath and a big warm bottle. I put her down late for bed and she went right to sleep. I got about 5 hours on top of the 5 the night before but I feel good. We had to be at Riley at 6am this morning. Got her checked in and they gave her a dose of lala juice. Boy was she funny, I tried to get some pictures but video would have been better. They just whisked her off and told me that anesthesiology would have her the first hour and then the Doc would take 3-4 hours. So she should be done around 11:30?? They will keep her sedated for awhile so the body can do it's thing. She might even be sedated over night!

Operation date set

What is this thing??

She loves to watch it float.

Blowing kisses

I took JaLia to the dentist yesterday for her pre-op check. The dentist was amazed at how nice her teeth were and she got a clean bill of health. I will be driving up to Riley tomorrow for her pre-op preparations and then hopefully stay the night for her 6am visit to the OR on Thursday. We don't know what time the surgery is till tomorrow so I won't be able to post it but please keep her in your prayers. I will be staying at the Ronald McDonald house if they have a room available and hopefully she'll be out in like 4 days !!!!!!!1

2 weeks home

So after 36 hours I was feeling human again. JaLia has had difficulty getting to bed at night. I tried to move back her bed time by 2 hours each night. She slept fine at the hotel and they told me, complete dark and no night light. Here she just screamed till you picked her up. I was afraid to move her to the bedroom because the boys needed to sleep for school. We finally just left the light on in her room and she made it thru the night just fine. After 2 good days she caught a low fever with no other symptoms that I could see so I thought I had just pushed her too much and she was "checking out" of these strange new things happening to her. She'd perk right up and eat with gusto so I let her sleep and didn't think to take her to the Dr............................. She either bites her lip at night or just rubs her nose on the sheet too much but she has been waking up with a bloody face and I had to get darker sheets. She also has a terrible habit of wiping her nose with her sleeves which helps contribute to the raw chapped face..................................................... Wednesday we went for our visit to Riley. She does have a large hole which will need repair. I have to talk with the Dr tonight and see when they can get her in. He is thinking about 3 weeks. ******ooh he just called and they want her next week so I can stay on my original plan. She will stay in the hospital anywhere from 4-10 days and then need 2 weeks to recover. On top of that she does have an ear infection. We put her on antibiotics and she perked right up. Her vaccination record looked good but I've heard those are often falsified or just a weak dosage that really needs to be redone................................ She refuses to drink American formula so they said it was best to revert to the bottle and see if that helps. She sucks down water all day so i feel good about that. I've been giving her fortified cereals cause I knew kids don't get enough iron but I didn't know that gummy vitamins don't have iron in them so i need to switch those. I suck at transitioning kids from baby food to people food so i need to work on her variety. So far everything has been mush. She could feed herself, I need to get over the clean up issue ~hahaah Her only dislikes so far have been french toast and grilled cheese. I'm really careful not to give her alot of things that she could eat but have gobs of preservatives,sodium and other chemicals that she is not used too.

I made it back....ALIVE

Now I know why my trip was so uneventful, the trip back was hell. I have to give a big shout out to Nikki and Bob, my Sooner Saviors!!!!. They hail from Edmond and I hope their daughter Brook is as thrilled with her new sister Bailey as my boys are with JaLia. They were on my flights from Guangzhou to Shanghai to Chicago and really helped out with the long layovers, baggage pick ups, security checks, customs and whats up with escalators at the gates?? I became a pro at getting that stroller up and down those escalators. While the trip over was great, we got sat in the middle of the 5 seat row on the way back. JaLia's foot was just small enough to fit under the armrest and she kick the lady next to us the whole way. I also figured out that she HATES seat belts. No matter how loose I made it, she fussed loudly. Unfortunately our evening flight from China was expecting turbulence so the seat belt needed to be left on and dinner was delayed over an hour. Luckily I had packed LOTS of snacks and that was the only thing that kept her quiet. I got back to a sick husband, so we were all miserable, all weekend. Sunday, just when I was getting to feel human again, I discovered the boys had Lice and then JaLia caught Jesse's flu.

Wednesday-Last Day in China

Wouldn't you know it, that last day and the sun came out. Yesterday we went to a museum of an old house, which is a big square with an open courtyard in the middle. It was cloudy so I didn't get many good pictures but it was a good ride back with lots of culture to see. Just started to get my bearings around here and it is time to leave.

I thought I would have more room in my suitcase without the orphanage gifts, but I guess I just filled them up with gifts for home. I also thought it best not to be short on diapers so I'm loaded up on those too.

I took JaLia to the park and she played hard. I usually keep her from a nap with all our running around but she passed out at 3pm so I need to wake her up so she will sleep tonight or let her sleep and wake her up early and hope she naps during our 7 HOUR layover in China. But I really want her to sleep on the 14 hour flight so I guess I should wake her up and let her cry in the room where I won't bother anyone. ~haha

Tuesday

We did the unceremonious red couch picture. The day is still cloudy and batteries are not strong enough to hold the flash ! Went to the open air museum, would of been nicer if it was a sunny day. Eva offered to take me to chinese resturant and then when I ordered, she told me she was leaving for a meeting.... haha It wasn't that good anyway. It is such a shame there is no GOOD food on this compound. They have some souviener shops but not like you would expect them to gear towards tourists. Anyway I'll pack tomorrow and get up real early Thursday for the long trip home. Since it's a week day I am hoping the flight will be not full.

Sunday

Sunday: Still cloudy, I went to early mass (all in chinese) and spoke with the priest beforehand. We took a trip to the zoo and my chinese batteries lasted about 20 minutes. JaLia was a real pill today, wouldn't drink anything all day. Wouldn't put on her hat, blanket, sit in stroller or walk by herself. She just wanted to be held. She wasn't happy but I made her take a nap. Now I will never get her to sleep.

Saturday

Saturday : It was cloudy and chill again, we spent the afternoon at the asian Wal-Mart. It was gearing up for Chinese New Years and I got some decorations. Took some wine coolers back to my room and ate noodles, again.

Friday

Friday : I woke up in a foul mood and thought I was coming down with something. The guide took us on a walking trip to the mall and it was sunny so the fresh air helped. After the trip everyone wanted to eat together so I got a beer and some hot food.

Thursday

Thursday: The day was cloudy and chill and everyone wanted to stay inside so I ended up staying in my room soooo boring.

Can U say H-A-P-P-Y??

For a girl with a heart condition, you would never know it. JaLia runs non-stop all day and is full of energy.

Boys: she loves hard boiled eggs but like you, not the yolk so much.

This morning a chinese guy asked if she was a boy or girl.....I guess the hot pink sweater and pants with bows was NOT a dead give away.

I gave her a bath and she loved it !!! Even the hair washing. It must have been the stacking cup magic.

Today was such a beautiful day. It got way too hot in the room, and I had to open a low window and turn off the central since they only have heat this time of year. The windows don't have screens on them so it will just be a matter of time before JaLia figures out how to throw her toys into the alley. I made them bring me a fan. Did I mention that my room is right over all the air returns. No wonder I am not sleeping. I didn't look at the clock last night but I was up for hours and then slept till 8am. I haven't slept that late in over 10 years!!!!

I made myself go out for a walk around the compound and what a difference a little shopping will do for a girl's mood. We skipped lunch and nap and went to the passport office. I met the family with the little boy from the same orphanage. She said that the orphanage had a pool, and they heard they had won some awards. You can tell it in JaLia's personality.

Then I met a lady who thought her daughter was from the same orphanage. They were the same age, but her daughter was unsteady walking and timid, soooo shy. They had been told she was potty trained and could feed herself. You just never know and it's all up to the divine. Speaking of that, I did find a Catholic church here on the compound but did not see any sign for mass times.

We got back from paperwork around 4:00, so I decided to venture out on my own for dinner. I went into what I thought was a resturant but it wasn't and then I couldn't find another one nearby so I was back in front of Lucy's. I was determinded NOT to eat American, so I had some lamb kabobs and fried rice and JaLia had noodles. The wine wasn't bad either.

Maybe I'll get some sleep tonight.

The last thing I wanted to eat in China was Subway!!

It was another great day. We had to get up early so we could go to the bank again. They take a real long time at the bank too, not just with US money but everybodies!!

We had to go back to the civil affairs office and say we were happy with our child and wanted to keep them. It was so great seeing all the new families!!

We had a small lunch and Jalia took a looong nap, when she got up (around 4:00) we went out for a stroll and I just grabbed a Subway for dinner. Hopefully when more people arrive they will want to venture out and eat at some local resturants. There aren't very many here on the compound and they don't seem to cater to English although they might when we get inside.

Jalia is a ball of fire. She breathes heavy, and I can't tell if it's the cold or her heart. She is very crouppy so hopefully that will go away soon. She eats well and Boys- she loves waffles, whale crackers and bananas. We also watched Power Rangers, Ben 10 and poke'mon in chinese. She has a constant look on her face like she has a joke and is waiting for you to catch on to it....

Well hopefully she will get sleepy soon, last night it was 9-930 before she went down. I am not sleeping well but we aren't doing anything so it's not like I'm worn down sitting in the hotel room. New camera batteries are dead already and I didn't bring spares so I need to get more and I'll try to send pictures..